Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Obamney


So now Obama AND Romney are both sending me letters. Somebody out there really must have a good sense of humor? I have a lot of Return to Sendering to do; time to waste some more of that Goldman Sachs money

Monday, August 13, 2012

Post Offensives

So normally i go to the post office to drop of my packages but since the location by my house went broke and closed down; i decided just stick it in the convenient blue mail box. As i drive up to the mailbox, about to deposit my mail, i realize that- oh whats this ITS OPEN AND EXPOSING PEOPLES MAIL OUT OF THE BACK!!!! It will be open from now all the way until tomorrow around 5pm when somebody will do something. I'm sure the honest people in the neighborhood wont help themselves to the free netflix dvds? Being the honest person I am i had the idea to just remove the mail and bring them with me to another location; but as the notion entered my head I was interrupted by a passing police car and realized i would be sent to prison for even being in the vicinity of this mailbox. So i cautiously left a note for all the other dear patrons of the usps NOT to use this particular mailbox.

Government service at its finest


Thursday, August 9, 2012

Facebook coincidences

Did this really just happen? Two of my friends who are random strangers just encountered each other at the same time; and facebook just told me about it...



Wednesday, August 1, 2012

Real ID Drivers License renewal

So it occurred to me last night while looking at my ID that its EXPIRED!!! So the logical thing to do is just go online and get a new one right?

The introduction of Nazi Florida is simple; its called REAL ID. To prove i am not an middle eastern extremist; apparently i need only 5 things Primary Identification, Proof of Social Security Number, 2 Proofs of Residential Address and a birth certificate. Sadly nor i or my parents have any of this information. So i guess i have to fly to Kenya and retrieve my birth certificate. Oh whats this? I need a valid form of Identification? HA my identification is expired. Who is the character who came up with this, what a card! har har

Let me remind you, this isnt about being able to drive on public roads- this is about public SAFETY. Everywhere i look I see dangerous suspicious extremists, i am so glad i can carry a card that not only clears my name as American but also allows me to operate my motor vehicle.

YOUR PAPERS... PLEASE!