Wednesday, May 26, 2010

the Dentist

So I just got back from the dentist...

He took some xrays of my head and told me that im going to have to get my wisdom teeth removed. He recommended a few oral surgeons, talked about costs and then installed a small rain cloud above my head. i think he forgot i was there to get drilled so after the x rays he was all happy to say good bye and see other patients walking in; when i was like "what are we going to do about my cavities?" . His demeanor changed and he told me to come back to the chair and quickly jostled some equipment together and gave me a single shot of novacane, then served 2 patients. "Nurse... Magazine please" and i was handed a Car and Driver magazine. At this point i was sort of paralyzed and just stared at the cover for 20 minutes without even opening it. For the past 10 years there has been a painting of a serene image of a lake and clouds and a poorly rendered floating mountain in the distance; but since last week it has been on the floor. I couldnt help but overhear him asking the old woman how her dentures looked and if she liked the shade of pink on the gums- and them complimented how real they looked. Earlier i filled out a health form to update there file; and one of the question asked if i thought my oral hygiene was important and why haha. Then it asked me if i ever considered dentures, and i circled NO and when asked why I said " too expensive".

Im glad he squeezed me in but when he started drilling my tooth i couldnt tell him how excruciating the pain was because my mouth was clamped open with rubber tubing everywhere. I figured the look of terror in my eyes and whimpers of submissive agony that came from me were a non verbal signal but he assured me what a tough guy i am. I wish my ego was big enough to take the pain out of my tooth while it was being hollowed out with a drill. haha this is just a self confirmation of the perverted nature of a dentist and why he chose this sadisti profession. in the end i shook his hand and thanked him for causing me the worst physical pain i have felt all year and booked another appointment for 2 weeks from now.

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